Dear 2017 Jhun,
How's life? I hope you're doing fine. Seriously, as of this moment, I can't think of anything to say to you. It's like I'm afraid to ask you, and of what, I don't know too. Blame it on the hormones, I think?
Okay, just so I can think of something, let's do a round of Chuwariwap. Right now Kodaline's One Day is playing. Somehow this part gave me the goosebummps
"You've felt this way for far too long
Waiting for a change to come
You know you're not the only one
And life passes you by
Don't be wasting your time
On your own"
Now let's wait for the answer to the reason what's in it for next year...
and it says...
Ten Feet Tall by Afroack
and I still can't comprehend why.
the next one is...
Beating Heart by Ellie Goulding
as for the last one...
The Sound by The 1975
now this cheered me up just because it's one of my faves
Let's just wait and see how your year will go. ;)
Seriously, even after all of this, I'm starting to get anxious again. It's like the coming year, I'll spend time waiting, for what, I hope you'll know the answer by then, once you read this. I hope you're still listening to your guts my dear. Trust them as much as I did, because as far as I can recall, it has never failed us. Go with the flow. See where life will take us. Believe.
I'll be waiting for your story soon
Yours,
2016 Jhun
***
Dear 2016 Jhun,
You weren't wrong when you said that you will spend time waiting since this letter is in fact, six years in the making. And I really am so sorry for that.
So, where should I start?
2017: You already knew that we were going someplace new. So, we ended up working in the school that we mentioned last time. The one nestled within acres of land surrounded by trees? It was out of the metro, roughly 2-3 hours away from home, that's why we ended up staying there for a couple of days a week and then just go home every weekends. The commute was tough but knowing us, we loved every moment of it. Who would've thought that during that time, we would end up becoming a preschool teacher. Funny, right? Initially, we were really supposed to be just a school nurse and assist the class adviser in handling the kids. But, later on, we became the class adviser.
We can't believe that we survived through all of that. It was a very humbling experience and we learned so much from it. We can still remember the daily routines wherein we have to sing the "days of the week', the "weather song", and everything else every single day. The test of patience is quite excruciating. Honestly, if a person has never interacted with a preschooler for more than a couple of days, they will not understand how hard it is to be with them everyday and to answer all of their curiosities while teaching them patience at the same time. They were not joking when they say kids never run out of "whys" and "how comes". But being the adult, you have to be patient with them because what you say, and how you say it, plays a huge part in shaping them into becoming who they are in the future. It was a very scary responsibility but somehow we got the hang of it. Honestly, we loved each and every moment. Watching our kids, especially the ones who started as bratty and spoiled, growing up as respectful and responsible made us feel proud and accomplished.
2019: We started to feel the strain of the travel to and from home, and those sleepless nights spent on paper works. It finally took its toll and we started to feel the itch again to be someplace new. I think it's become a pattern with us. Two years tops and our wandering feet will start to feel restless once more. So before the new school year started, we talked with the principal, who has also become our mentor and friend and told her of our decision to leave. Unexpectedly, she initially denied our request. Instead, she asked if we could stay for another year just to give them time to prepare and to look for another teacher who can handle the class. And we obliged, knowing that we could never leave them hanging just like that. So, during the school year, we decided to look for jobs abroad. One of the jobs that we were considering then was a nursing job in Germany. We even planned to take up language courses to prepare for it,. You know us, making plans like this means that we are taking this seriously because honestly, we are more of the go with the flow type of people, ayt? So us making plans for the future is a huge leap for us. An actual attempt of becoming a serious adult. But....
2020: It had other plans for us. We believe that making the decision to stay is a huge blessing in disguise for us. Why? Because the pandemic happened. If we didn't stay at the school, we probably would have already been working in a hospital. Lucky for us, we were able to continue working from home during that time. We were able to finish the school year through online classes. However, despite of the pandemic, we still pushed through with the idea of leaving the academe. I remember, before the pandemic hit, we jokingly asked my sister if we could just be a bum for a couple of months just to rest then, we promised to look for work after that. And voila, our wish came true. We didn't have work for a couple of months and god, we hated the feeling. We were going crazy for lack of routine and not being able to go out due to forced community quarantine.
Good thing, there was the internet. We accidentally stumbled upon a post of one of our grade school classmates about a nursing job in one of the government facilities. We considered it but one look at all the forms we needed to fill, we almost said pass. Lucky for us, we have a bestie who never tires to push us and knock us on the head with a hammer whenever we get too passive with our life's decisions. After a couple of pushes and shoves, we finished the application and after months of waiting, we got the job.
Another funny thing about this is that after all those years of wandering around and aiming to move far from home, we ended up working at a place just a couple of stones throw away from our house. Literally, we can get to work within a 5-10 minute walk. Life can really get funny sometimes.
2022: So now, here we are, 2 years in in our current job; working as a nurse in a government-run residential facility for the abandoned and neglected elderly. And everyday, our heart bleeds for them. Until now, we still can't accept the fact that some of these people still have families, but those families still chose to leave them here on their own and just come back for their ashes once their gone. Personally, we couldn't imagine doing that to our own parents and grandparents. But, one thing we've learned through all these years is to never judge other people. We could never know the whole story or whatever reasons they might have. We just try to understand and do our best to give these elderly the love and care that their relatives couldn't give them. It could be draining at times. But again and again, for us it was all worth it.
While we're at it, since we already reached our 2 year mark (I know, it's becoming a pattern), we are once again considering other job opportunities outside the country. Maybe because we just wanted to explore the world a much as we can, for as long as we can. However, there's also another possibility that we are considering as well, and that is pursuing our dream of becoming a doctor. Until now, I'm not sure if it's a path worth pursuing. But if you ask me if it's something I want, I do. I do want it more than anything else. But being the ever considerate and doubtful person that we are, we are still not sold on the idea of pursuing medical school this late. We think that it is a more rational decision to pursue our current career instead. Two of our aunts are even pushing us to apply for nursing jobs in their hometown. One is in Canada, while the other is in Wales. We're still confused because of all of these options. Who do we follow? Our heart or our head. I just hope that we could make our decision soon and that whatever it maybe, we will still be happy.
Another reason that our dream of becoming a doctor was awakened again was because of what happened to our mama. She suffered from mild stroke around late August and we ended up watching over her during her confinement. Honestly, it was the most fear we've experienced in our entire life - knowing that in the blink of an eye you could lose someone you love while you stand there, helpless. It's something we've experienced 12 years ago, and even after all those years, we were still never prepared for it. The good thing though was mama was able to recover and she was recovering fast. Though she was still being hardheaded about her limits, but at least she was okay. The thing is, while we were at the hospital, we felt at home. Like everything clicked and fell into place. The easy camaraderie we felt with the doctors and nurses that we don't usually feel with other strangers. We just can't ignore the adrenaline rush we feel while being there. Weird, I know. Who else likes being in the hospital anyway? Apparently, me.
Anyway, there were several highlights that are worth mentioning:
1. Our last trip before the pandemic hit. Leap day, 2020. We visited Mariveles, Bataan and spent the day island hopping and cliff jumping. You know us, we took the leap on leap day literally. Hahaha. But the best part was when we spent the night drinking a couple of beers and lying on the sand - stargazing while intoxicated which made it more fun in my opinion. Saw a lot of wishing stars then but can't remember the wishes we've made.
2. Our bestie is finally a lawyer! Hooray! Now we have someone to call in case we find ourselves in a sticky situation. Hahahuhu. Sssshhhh. It's also worth noting the time we spent with the said bestie, belting our hearts out to all of the Taylor Swift tracks in the karaoke for 3 hours straight. Seriously, no breaks in between.
3. Back to cinemas. After 2 years of getting stuck with Netflix, we finally were able to do one of the things that we love to do. Watching movies in the cinema while munching on popcorn and soda. Another me time favorite.
4. Concerts. Like cinema watching, we were finally able to watch a live concert again this year. Hooray! Thanks to our bestie who got us the tickets for The Script's concert last September. Another fun fact, I ended up crying my eyes out while singing along to "If You Could See Me Now". If you know me, then you know the reason why. ;)
5. Beach. After our last travel on 2020, we got to visit the beach again. First, last March where we spent it with our work friends. We rented an Airbnb situated on top of a cliff at the tip most part of the island (in Sual, Pangasinan). It was a long drive but worth the wait. It was just so peaceful and we got to watch the sunrise over the horizon, right on our deck. Then, just recently, last week we visited Boracay with our work friends again. It was different from our last travel but still, it was amazing. We did island hopping and other touristy stuff as well. But one of the best highlights for us was watching the famous Boracay sunset while on a yacht cruise with party crazy Koreans. Hahaha!
6. We also got to try going to a jazz bar. Another experience worth repeating.
7. Vinyl. We bought ourselves a turntable and started our dream of collecting vinyl.
8. Camera. Being the old soul that we are, instead of buying ourselves a high end cellphone, we opted to buy a DSLR camera instead. I guess we just love carrying our extra baggage around. :P
So there. That has been our life for the past couple of years. It was not all great, but with all the decisions we've made, there's nothing that we would change. No regrets, remember?
Yours,
2022 Jhun
 |
| Boracay Sunset |
***
Dear 2023 Jhun,
I don't know how you are or where you will be when this letter finds you. I just hope that you are somewhere that you wanted to be. Somewhere that you are meant to be.
I'm seriously curious about the path that you chose. Why did you choose it?
As I'm writing this, Dare You to Move by Switchfoot suddenly played and I got goosebumps all over. It's like the universe is daring us to move forward. Asking us the question "What happens next?"
So tell me, what happened?
What are the places you've been to? Are you still in the same workplace as before? Made any new friends? I hope this time around, you wouldn't wait for another 6 years again just to tell me your story.
Just remember, wherever the wind blows us, it is because it is where we're meant to be. We were put there because it is where we will make a difference.
