Mixtape

Music blaring on
my earphones
to keep the thought
of you at bay.
Yet, it's the
unavoidable 
seconds of silence
in between
wherein you
keep on popping in.
Until the record stops
and all that I'm left with
is the hissing sound
of the remaining reel
and you.

Waiting In Vain

I kept my hand

laid out open wide

against the pillow

beside my head;

patiently waiting for 

the warmth of yours

to slip through the spaces

in between.

I patiently wait,

even as the cold breeze 

seeping through my window sill

keeps them numb,

for the hope of you

is what keeps me wanting

to wake up to the next sunrise.

From the very first time I rest my eyes on you, boy 

My heart said follow through

But I know now that I'm way down on your line 

But the waiting feeling's fine...

Lost and Found

To be lost is the

only way to be found.

Like a once adored trinket,

that brings nothing else back

but painful memories and lost love,

flung off to the crashing waves

as if trying to drown the pain.

Where another man finds it 

along with his morning catch,

and brings it home to his wife

to remind her of his love,

as if reminding too the trinket

of the purpose it was meant for

before it was tossed into the sea. 

Ebb Tide

You are the shiver 

sending goosebumps

across my skin;

shaking off the frost

that lingered

on my numbed heart.

It tries 

to keep in time with

the new found rhythym

from the calming waves,

as it learns

how to beat again

for you.

The Girl You Left Behind

She is different now,

yet she is still 

the same girl you left behind.

Underneath her 

glassy eyed stare,

you can catch a glimpse of

the sparkle that 

once shone her eyes.

The ones that appear only

whenever she looks at you.

The creases 

on the sides of her lids

that deepen everytime she smiles

show you how time flew past 

without you knowing 

how they got there.

She is  different now,

but she's still the same girl

who loved you before.

And loves you still.

And patiently waits for you

to step in from the cold

and straight to the comfort 

of her embrace.

So lay down your arms

and meet her there,

on the same place

where you left your heart behind.

image source

*** I just finished reading this book and I'm still in that emotional turmoil since I've started it. Gaaahh. I need something to snap me out of this self-inflicted misery. 

Take Me With You

Trapped within the confines

of the city lights

and the pouring rain.

The sounds echoing 

against the concrete walls.

Yet I can still hear

the sound of the crashing waves

and the feel of the 

warm sun against my skin

as we cast our shadows

against the sand.

As you whisper words

against my ear

that only us can hear.

I can still hear your voice

even if that summer's been long gone.

Take me with you

'Cause even by yourself, my love

You are something else

One summer turns into ten summers

One lover turns into ten others

But this memory is still with me

So close bring me in so close

Your clothes underneath my clothes

Once upon a time in Portugal

No Regrets

Many have tried making me

jump off cliffs with eyes closed,

sending blood pumping through my veins

like a kid high on sugar rush.

But it was only you

that gave the calm  

my heart truly needs.

The sea that caught me 

after that reckless leap,

and lets me swim through it

while keeping me safe 

in its waters.

So here we go head first

And no regrets and no rules

We can stay as long as we want

Slow dancing in the darkness

And all I know is I wanna be here with you from now on

***Just when I thought I won't be able to write anything today, this version pops up on my screen. What else can a silly girl like me do but daydream? ;)

Scars

It hurts.

Here -

underneath my left rib.

Like a physical pain

but much worse

than I thought it would.

My fingers traced 

against this scar

as blood seeps through;

while thoughts of you

tugs the string 

tied around my heart,

as the other end

opens up the wound

I thought was healed long ago

whenever it tries

to reach out for you.

Nothing Compares 2 U

At first,

you were nothing 

but merely a simple want

I've learned to deny myself.

Until your hands 

brushed against my skin

and sent shivers

down my spine.

A shiver that was

set not by the cold wind,

but by the warmth

of your fingertips

trailing across my neck,

towards my back.

That was when 

a simple want

turned into

something more;

into this clawing need

right here

deep in my gut

that I could never

deny myself any longer.

No Strings Attached

Hearts still racing,
with limbs tangled in sheets,
she turned to him and 
held is face between her palms 
and told him,

"You are too beautiful to be real."

"It's impossible that I can have you
with no strings attached.
I'm afraid to think of
what the universe will take 
to even the balance."

"Don't worry love.
Just spend the rest of
your life with me
and we'll figure it out together."

White Lies

We wrote our story

in invisible ink,

that needs to be illuminated

by the purple light

to be seen.

It was meant to be read 

under the cover of the

dark shadows;

and when the morning comes,

the shadows shall leave,

and shall too the lies

we wrote in invisible ink.

Lullabies and Sunrise

"If the time comes

that I will run out of

lullabies to sing you to sleep,

would you still 

want to wake up to

the sunrise

while lying next to me?"

she asked

then he replied,

"Never fear my love,

for if that day comes,

the day when you 

run out of lullabies

to sing me to sleep,

that will be the day 

that I will never

want to wake up to."

"For the only lullaby

I will ever need 

is the feel of

your heart beating

against my chest

and the sound of

your breath 

against my ear;

while knowing in my heart

that it's you -

right here 

in my arms -

I'd wake up to,

while the morning sun rises."

Mouthful of Forevers

After being introduced to alot of awesome (and surprisingly still alive :P) poets like Tyler Knott, Lang Leav, Michael Faudet, Sarah Kay and Phil Kaye, I found another one to add on my list. and her name is Clementine (oh, I just love her name. It always reminds me of this hauntingly beautiful song) von Radics. It just so happened that I accidentally stumbled across her book while browsing through the shelves of a bookstore and I got intrigued by the title so I looked her up and voila! I saw the poem wherein the book got its title from. Looks like I just found the first item on my Christmas Wishlist. ;)

Mouthful of Forevers

by Clementine von Radics

I am not the first person you loved.
You are not the first person I looked at
with a mouthful of forevers. We
have both known loss like the sharp edges
of a knife. We have both lived with lips
more scar tissue than skin. Our love came
unannounced in the middle of the night.
Our love came when we’d given up
on asking love to come. I think
that has to be part
of its miracle.

This is how we heal.
I will kiss you like forgiveness. You
will hold me like I’m hope. Our arms
will bandage and we will press promises
between us like flowers in a book.
I will write sonnets to the salt of sweat
on your skin. I will write novels to the scar
of your nose. I will write a dictionary
of all the words I have used trying
to describe the way it feels to have finally,
finally found you.

And I will not be afraid
of your scars.

I know sometimes
it’s still hard to let me see you
in all your cracked perfection,
but please know:
whether it’s the days you burn
more brilliant than the sun
or the nights you collapse into my lap
your body broken into a thousand questions,
you are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
I will love you when you are a still day.
I will love you when you are a hurricane.

Polarity

You have all of my words.
Feel 
each word 
snap into place 
like a kiss against your lips,
each space
as I take a breath in between.
Let them cover 
every inch of your skin
until they learn
to memorize
everything of me.

just in case you're curious, these are my poetry magnets and that's the metal board where the magic happens. ;)

When We Were Young

When I was young, I learned how to trust

the hand that guides me through busy streets

and crowded places even if my eyes can't see

where we were headed.

With my hand holding on tight,

I blindly weaved through hundreds of 

pairs of legs and feet

and swivled my way through these busy streets.

Until the pavements became too familiar to me

like the back of my hands

and I thought I won't need it anymore,

that hand that's been guiding me all along.

I thought I could make it on my own.

But then I suddenly found myself

turn around the corner of an unfamiliar street

and suddenly my fingers started clutching tight,

as if itching for the feel

of the hand that will pull me through the crowd.

Fix You

If I shall come to you, 
it would not be because
I need you to fix me or 
for you to fill in 
these gaping holes.
I might need sutures and mending,
that I can be sure of,
but when I come to you,
I have to pick up first
the pieces I lost along the way.
I need to be complete
of all the pieces 
that make me whole,
even if they're not
completely fixed at all.
Because when I come to you,
I want you to know
that what I'm offering
is all I have
and all that I can ever give,
and that 
I came to you
not because I need you to fix me,
but because 
I just want to be right where you are.

Lights will guide you home
and I will try to fix you...
*****

I Just Want You

Falling early into bed
after a very long day,
just to find myself waking up 
in the middle of the night
as the nightmare 
lingers at the back of my mind.
With my arms
hugging the pillow tight,
wishing it was you instead
that I was holding in my arms.

So take it all away if it isn’t meant for me

I don’t want the easy way. I just want you.

They can give me everything, but at the end of the day

the only words I’ll say, I just want you.

Don't Look Down

Everytime I look up to the sky,

it makes it easier for me

to feel closer to you.

When I keep my sight

way up high,

it makes this

tiny flicker of hope

I keep within my chest

to burn brighter

for it keeps me believing that

we are guided

by the same sun

and blanketed by the same stars.

It eases away the ache

whenever I yearn,

for if I keep my eyes up to the sky,

I can never see the 

mountains nor hills,

nor the vast ocean

that separates us in between.

Love Song For No One

I remember about a few months ago, I was having tea with Rhio and we played this game called "Query". It's just a simple game wherein you pick out a card and you have to answer the question written there no matter how mundane or weird it is. Anyway, there was this one question that I can't quite remember how it was worded out, but somehow it goes like this (I think) "If there's one thing that can be done for you or happen to you once in a lifetime, what would it be?" and I answered "To have a song written about me/just for me." ;P I know, it may sound cheesy and all, but hey! I'm a girl by default and I have a right to be swept off my feet by this kind of romantic gesture no matter how cynical I am sometimes (or most of the time), ayt?! Oh well, this is just my introduction for the following videos that I'm going to post wherein you'll find guys, with their guitars and pianos and songs, that definitely make me swoon every-freakin-time. Enjoy. ;)

 

 

 

 

of course, there is also an exception to the rule (the piano and guitar rule.;P)

especially since I'll be watching him live next week >(^o^)<

Get Here

I feel no need

for baubles or trinkets;

nor fireworks

and grand gestures.

I only need 

for you to be here,

to share with me 

each sunrise

and sunset that's left in our lifetime.

To wake up each morning

and know that 

it's you I'll wake up to.

I don't care

for baubles and trinkets;

nor fireworks

and grand gestures.

Just be here

and give me back the life

you stole

for every little death

I suffer

everytime I breathe out

the air in my lungs,

without you here

to catch it

and bring it back to me.